Thursday, December 21, 2006

Big decision: Which family do we spend holidays with?

The biggest decision of the holiday season isn’t deciding on which sweater Grandma would actually wear once you bought it or which honey-baked ham place has the better deal; it’s deciding on where you and your significant other are going to spend the holidays.

Granted, this decision was likely made weeks ago, but that doesn’t mean it’s not weighing on your mind – the long hours in the car, the short amount of time spent with each family, the stress that comes with making sure you have all the presents accounted for.

Dividing up family time during the holidays has to rank as one of the most trying efforts of any relationship. It’s not an easy decision. It seems like every family has their own traditions. Some host the big celebration on Christmas Eve, complete with egg nog, appetizers and caroling. Other families prefer the big morning gift opening to be the centerpiece of their holiday. And then again, other families don’t celebrate Christmas at all. You don't want to upset the apple cart, especially when it comes to strict traditions that have been passed down from generation to generation.

All these decisions affect your relationship. You want to make everyone happy – or at least, I feel I have to. Life seemed so much easier when we were kids – Mom and Dad would just pick one place for the holidays and that’s where we spent it. Now, as a married couple – with no kids – we feel compelled to split our time among family.

I believe most of us are thankful and blessed to have such a hard choice to make, but I have to say, it sure doesn’t make it any easier.

How do you handle family time during the holidays? Do you switch off the major holidays with each side of the family, or do you pull double-duty and visit both sides on the same holiday? Has this big decision caused major stress in your relationship; if so, how have you handled it?


Anonymous said...

My favorite holiday was when a snow storm kept us from having to go to either families for Christmas. I love them both, but it was so special just spending christmas with my family.

Anonymous said...

from Georgia boy....
Hint...GROW UP! Start YOUR day God will bless you with children...YOUR family, not P's or D's. Let the older folks dealing with grandkids plan around your plans!

Anonymous said...

Look around and ask all that you know. The women always end up with their families on the holidays. It may start out with a 50/50 split but in 5-10 years after getting married, it will be spent with her family. Ask around, this is true like 90% of the time.

Anonymous said...

Why not just pick the family that is the least batshit crazy? My family is great, homemade waffles, and after mas I can hit the bar and visit with friends I haven't seen in a year.

My ex's family, batshit crazy. Would have been an easy, easy choice for me.